#205 Blog Post 11 December 2024
http://dennyhatch.blogspot.com/2024/12/205-onlne-book-club.html
Posted by Denny Hatch
If You're Writing a Book, Here’s the Inside Skinny
On Getting a Low-cost, Professional Book Review
That Will Be Seen by 5 Million+ Guaranteed Readers!
Who Can Turn Your 80,000 Words Into a Best Seller?
Marvelous Dedicated Readers a.k.a. Book Reviewers!
Back the 1960s – 1980s you could
always find book reviews every day in several thousand daily, weekly and monthly U.S.
newspapers and magazines. Many of these have long gone bankrupt and out of
business.
A
majority of today’s publications don’t feature book reviews at all even though roughly
2 million traditionally published and self-published books come onto the market
in America every year.
In
short, book reviews these days are scarcer than hen’s teeth.
Virginia Kirkus.
In
1933 Virginia Kirkus
— with a background as an English teacher, McCall’s Magazine editor, and
founder of Harper Brothers’ children’s fiction department — launched the iconic
Kirkus Reviews. She reigned
supreme (along with The New York Times) for 90 years.
Basic Cost for a Kirkus Book Review
Today
the twice-a-month Kirkus Reviews has 15,000 subscribers who pay $179 a
year for reviews of roughly 10,000 books a year. Basic charge to an author or
publisher for a 250-word Kirkus review is $450. (A 500-word review is $599.) No
guarantee of a good review.
Scott Hughes.
Over a decade ago Scott Hughes founded the Free Online Book Club (now with a reported 5
million+ members!).
Scott
Writes:
OnlineBookClub.org is a free site for readers that has
been around for over 10 years, before smartphones even!
We
have a ton of awesome features for book lovers and a massive community of
active members from all over the world.
Some
of our most popular features include:
•
Exclusive, original reviews by our
professional review team -
Find the gems out of the millions of books published each year alone.
•
Our free web app Bookshelves - Bookshelves enables you to
easily store, track, and share lists of books you have read and want to read.
•
Our Book & Reading Forums - No longer do you need to
schedule a specific book club meeting time in your busy schedule. At any time
you want, you can instantly discuss any book you have read with other people
who read the same book. This is a free fun super-social group of hundreds of
thousands of welcoming people.
It
is all free for readers. We are not a book store, and we do not sell
books. We are a free online community for readers with all sorts of awesome
free features and free tools for book lovers. In terms of going to book stores
like Amazon to get books, our own free
Book of the Day tool notifies
you when well-rated books go on temporary free promotions. So sign
up easily and completely free now.
—Scott Hughes
Basic Cost for an OBC Review: $148
If
an author or publisher wants a book reviewed by Online Book Club, the current
minimum cost to reach Scott’s five million+ members (with no limit on the number
of words) is: Level 1 Review - $148. (Includes 1 week featured status and entry
into Book of the Year Contest). Scott offers a slew of opportunities to spend additional
money promoting a book.
The Extraordinary Tale of the Online
Book Club’s Surprise
Rave Review of a 70-year-old Novel by
Denny Hatch!
Quick
backgrounder: In the
1970s I was deep into my career in direct marketing. In spare time — to get my
head out of my work — I wrote three outrageous novels that were published, optioned
for Hollywood films and later reprinted as mass market paperbacks. My favorite
and most fun was The Stork. It was optioned by Universal.
My wonderful agent,
Marvin Moss, called to tell me The Stork — hot off my typewriter — had
been optioned for three months for $5,000 by Universal Pictures. I was
catapulted into Seventh Heaven. It got better!
Directed by John Avildsen! Wow! This
totally unknown young director became an instant filmdom legend by winning the
1977 Academy Award as Best Director for his very first movie: ROCKY.
Avildsen had brought ROCKY in
for just under $1 million and it generated $225 million in world box office
sales. He was hot, hot, HOT! Alas, the
option on The Stork lapsed and no film was made. (The options foe the other two published novels also lapsed. No movie ever made it into a film.) The Stork was sold to Jove for
a mass market paperback and got some dandy reviews. Whereupon Marvin Moss died
young. I was doing very well in marketing and never had a literary agent again.
Here’s the Kirkus review:
Kirkus Reviews
February 15, 1977
Hatch, Denison
THE STORK
Morrow $8.95
4/4/ LC: 76-46420
SBN: 688-03160-9
Tim
Smith is called “The Stork” because of his leggy, bony, storky mien, but the
nickname takes on new meaning when Tim leaves his father’s cattle stud-farm
empire and applies his unrivaled breeding know-how to humans, a computerized
sperm bank for the best in artificial insemination. Unfortunately, even with
the prestige of his reluctant partner’s name (Bink Roosevelt, supposedly an FDR
grandson) and the expertise and dollars of Dr. Resnikow (Central Park South’s
top gynecologist), Tim’s operation is a flop. So, to stimulate business, Tim
and Bink and Doc resolve to fill their “creamatorium” with a “Who’s Who of
American sperm” — an easy proposition once Tim meets Tony Wilde (as in Oscar),
top honcho at S.A.D.D.O.G. S.A.D.D.O.G?
Sons and Daughters descended of the Great.
Soon all those ne’er-do-well scions are hooked up to the ACCU-JAC
machine—encouraged by screenings of Marilyn Chambers and Linda Lovelace—and
Tim’s menu promises everything from a third-generation Hemingway ($37,000) to a
sixteenth-generation Hans Holbein the Elder ($12,000). Business booms, but
Bink’s ethics, a muckraking reporter (“This story’s going to do for me what
Watergate did for Woodward and Bernstein!), hints of forged genealogies, and
one slight error (a Southern senator’s wife gets an Adam Clayton Powell)
precipitate a sticky Day of Judgment. When he isn’t regressing from the
sophomoric to the freshmantic (“seed money,” “notary pubic,” “El Seed”), Hatch
unreels this fantasia with approximated the right mix of slapstick, word-play,
and documentary mock-seriousness. He also decorates the doings with so many
au-courrancies that The Stork is already dated (Clay Felker plays an
important role as New York Magazine editor), so this is not one for the
ages, or even next year, but, for the moment and for those uninterested in
doing vaguely real things, The Stork makes for a lively enough delivery.
(Word
count: 298)
Note
From Denny Hatch:
In
2022 I re-read The Stork published in 1973. I found it to be a giggle
and wondered if this 70-year-old warhorse could have a second life. Was it
still funny? Relevant? Would it resonate with today’s film buffs and video
streamers if it became a movie?
I
was very, very dubious it would fly today. But worth a shot for $148. I emailed
it to Online Book Club and ordered a review.
Review of The Stork
Post by Ruth Omonegho » 28 Oct 2022, 07:12
[Following is an official
OnlineBookClub.org review of "The Stork" by Denny Hatch.]
_______________________________
3 out of 4
stars
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Review
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These
days, there are cases of IVF where couples that can’t generally conceive
because of an anomaly in the husband are given a chance to be parents. Some
people donate their sperm for this purpose, but few genuinely take this as a
regular means of generating revenue for themselves. However, if you, as a
troubled parent, were offered the sperm of a descendant of a famous person, let
us say, Michael Jackson, what would you do? How much would you pay to have the
baby of Michael Jackson’s descendant?
The Stork: A Comedy About Breeding People is the story of Tim Smith (The
Stork), who, after helping his father in the business of selling sperm of bulls
all over the world, decides to start a life of his own and takes his friend,
Balthus Roosevelt (Bink), along to New York. During their brief stay in Spain,
they meet a medical student who donates sperm for a living. After a brief
discussion, Tim is motivated to start an artificial insemination business,
leveraging the expertise of Dr Resnikow, who provides the facility and funding
for their business (Delees Corporation). Starting up becomes so rough that they
almost go bankrupt. To save their business, they must go the extra mile to
surpass their competitors. What do they do? How do they manage to get through?
Grab this copy of the comedy and enjoy.
Right off the bat, I need to commend the expertise of Denny Hatch. This book is
an old book that the author decided to bring back to life. It was once
scheduled to go on screen, but unfortunately, it didn’t materialize. This book
would have made an excellent and hilarious movie. If, by chance, you are
reading this and have the capacity to make the author's dream come to life by
connecting him with someone who can produce this book into a movie, feel free
to connect with him. I forgot to mention that a true-life event inspired the
story.
At first, I got confused at the beginning because I couldn’t place what or who
Glen Muir was. However, as I read on and realized what Glen was, I flowed into
the whole realm and enjoyed every bit of it. The author's descriptive power
brought every page of the book to life. I couldn't get lost because it was so
vivid. The characters are well developed so that you know the background of all
the key characters and can easily identify with them.
My favorite is Balthus Roosevelt. Even though the business is promising, his
moral standard still stands. However, he has gone so deep that it has become
difficult for him to pull out. Even at that, he tried his best to stand by the
truth. Mike O'Shea, the Irishman, seems to be my funniest character. His
introduction brings a lot of comic relief to the whole plot. ‘You phony
bastard’ is a phrase that makes him stand out from the rest of the characters.
I was skeptical about him initially, and my skepticism was eventually
justified.
One of the lessons that stood out for me is that just because your father or
grandfather is famous does not mean you can be as successful if you do not put
in the effort. In fact, their fame, many times, causes a burden for their
offspring. Another is, do not be gullible. Move back and run when you are told
something too good to be true. How on earth can anyone believe that Jesus
Christ has a descendant? As I said earlier, the author did a great job with
this book.
There is nothing to dislike about this book. However, I found more than ten
errors while reading, so I will rate this book 3 out of 4 stars. I
implore the author to edit this book one more time.
I recommend this book to lovers of comedy and those who want to learn one or
two things regarding artificial insemination. I wish the author well on his
mission to get a producer for this book. I would love to see it on the screen
one day.
The Stork
View: on Bookshelves | on Amazon
3 out of 4
stars
==============================
Note from Denny Hatch:The wonderful reviewer, Ruth
Omondgho, was spot on in terms skewering me for my typos and errors. I
published it on Amazon Kindle in a hurry for one reason only — to preserve it for
posterity. I did not flyspeck it. My bad. I am ashamed. I was lucky to have
been penalized only one star.
An Aside: Scott Hughes’ Extraordinary Ironclad Rules
Governing His Online Book Club Reviews:
• Reviewers can say
anything they want. No guarantees of a good review. A reviewer that does not
like book can say so and award zero stars.
•
However... and this is a HUGE HOWEVER... (In decades of
interaction with the publishing industry I have never heard of this
revolutionary policy.) Before an OBC review can be published, the reviewer must
prove to the author’s complete satisfaction that the entire book was read
from start to finish.
Takeaways to Consider
Comparing the two reviews of the same book:
• The Kirkus review is literate, witty, hands-off
and fun — the work of a highly competent professional.
• My opinion: the OLBC review is more intimate — a reader's personal
experience with the off-the-wall plot and reaction to some wildly improbable characters.
• My opinion: both Kirkus and OLBC management got their full money's worth from their
world-class, caring reviewers.
• Scott Hughes' has issued this unspoken invitation to
OBC members try book reviewing: You are
invited to add your name to the roster of some of the world's most
distinguished and renowned literary celebrities who sometimes
reviewed books and made a difference in the lives of readers, authors, editors,
movie moguls and actors. Among them:
T.S. Eliot | Ray Bradbury | John F. Kennedy | Tennessee Williams
Toni Morrison | Nora Ephron | John Kenneth Galbraith | Bill Gates
Stephen King | Joan Didion | Susan Sontag | Dorothy Parker
James Baldwin | Edgar Allan Poe | Joyce Carol Oates | John Updike
Scott is perpetually on the hunt for new book reviewers. He writes:
• Get Paid to Review Books, Completely Free.
How it works: You are given a selection of online books
to choose. The books are free for you in exchange for a review. After your
first approved review, you will be eligible to get paid for the reviews too.
• There is never any cost to you. This is completely free to you,
the reviewer. You do not have to say you loved the book if you didn't.
You are being paid for an honest, quick review, not a positive review. Most
payouts currently range between $5-$60 per review.
• You Are Invited to Have a Look at My Blog Post of Several Years Ago on How to Create a Best-seller — GUARANTEED! —DH
http://dennyhatch.blogspot.com/2018/10/28-secrets-of-blitzkrieg-prpublicity.html
###
A Riveting Rave Review of Denny Hatch's Masterpiece.
By Oluchi Samuel
10 December 2024
An official OnlineBookClub.org review of Method Marketing by Denny Hatch.]
5 out of 5 Stars
To
make a lot of profit, business owners need to understand and employ
marketing. As the name implies, Method Marketing by Denny Hatch is a
book that educates readers on method marketing. The author also shares
the stories of some people who employed method marketing.
Marketing
is the business of acquiring customers and continually thrilling them.
Method marketing, on the other hand, is the ability to get inside the
heads and under the skin of the people you are marketing your product
to. Direct mail is the largest advertising medium, and it is the medium a
lot of method marketers build their businesses on. The author shared
the stories of some marketers with huge businesses. These marketers were
Father Bruce Ritter, Martin Edelston, John Peterman, Bill Bonner, Bob
Shnayerson, Curt Strohacker, David Oreck, and William Kennedy. They
owned businesses like The Boardroom, J. Peterman Company, Agora
Publishing, The Eastwood Company, The Oreck Corporation, and Western
Monetary Consultants. He shared their stories, how they started their
businesses, and he also dropped points for marketers to pick up from
their experiences.
This is a wonderful book with lots of great
lessons in marketing. I loved that the author shared some successful
marketers' experiences. He used these stories to educate us. He
discussed how they started their businesses and some of the mistakes
they made along the way. These real-life stories made me understand his
lessons quite well. I appreciated them. Readers who are planning on
venturing into these businesses could learn a great deal from these
stories. The author also exposed me to some businesses I hadn't heard of
before, like The Teaching Company, Agora Publishing, Quest/77, and The
Oreck Company.
Copywriting is a business venture I have been
meaning to start. Luckily for me, I got the opportunity to read this
book. The author showed the significance of copywriting and also shared
tips on how to write a great copy. It gave me insights and taught me how
good a copy should be written. The story of the First Bank of Troy was
one of the stories I loved. The president of the bank, Frank O. Brock,
operated a customer-friendly business. He paid personal attention to all
his customers. He would go over lists of customers and call or give
personal notes to them at least once a month. As a novice in marketing, I
appreciated the appendix the author added at the end of the book. It
saved me a lot of trips to the dictionary.
For all these reasons, I rate this book 5 out of 5 stars.
It is an amazing book that all marketers should read. There was
absolutely nothing to dislike. I found one error, showing that it was
professionally edited. I recommend it to marketers and people planning
on venturing into marketing, as it contains a lot of tips to flourish in
marketing.
******
Method Marketing
View: on Bookshelves | on Amazon
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