Tuesday, March 30, 2021

#122 Blog Post Mah Jongg

 #122 Blog Post - Tuesday, March 30, 2021

http://dennyhatch.blogspot.com/2021/03/122-blog-post-mah-jongg.html

Posted by: Denny Hatch

 

The Most Fun, Fascinating & Funkiest
501(c)(3) Business I Have Ever Seen!

 

  (Stick around. You might be able to use this business
model to become rich beyond the dreams of avarice!)

What triggered this post is one of Peggy's myriad hobbies—picked up during the Covid-19 lockdown—the Chinese game of Mah Jongg. Reportedly invented in the mid-18th century—with an estimated 300 million devotees worldwide—it's played with 152 tiles. Americans play under the aegis of the National Mah Jongg League. During Covid-19 Peggy plays with friends online.

From the National Mah Jongg League Website
https://www.nationalmahjonggleague.org

In 1937 a number of Mah Jongg enthusiasts met in New York City to standardize the game so that all Mah Jongg players would play the same hands and rules—it was at this meeting that the National Mah Jongg League was founded. Each year the League changes the hands and rules to add more excitement to the game.


For more than 75 years, the National Mah Jongg League has been the arbitrator for everything that relates to American Maajih. The League started with 32 members and today numbers over 350,000.


• The League publishes the American
   Version of the Rules.

• Supplies the Official Standard Hands
   and Rules Cards each year.

• Sells merchandise for playing the game
   and replacing missing playing pieces.

• Answers questions and arbitrates
   disputes about individual games.

• Makes numerous donations to
   charitable organizations. 

 

A Unique Set of Rules

Traditional games—e.g., bridge, poker, chess or backgammon—have a set of rules, values and pieces known to players all over the world. Mah Jongg is different. In order to play Mah Jongg in America, Peggy is required to purchase a $9 (small) or $10 (large) card from the National Mah Jongg League with the 2021 hands and rules. Anyone who purchases a card is automatically a member of the League.

 

The main benefit is you can play Official American Mah Jongg anywhere with any member in the USA. Without membership in the League—and the yearly card—you are outta luck. 

 

In a stroke of brilliantly intuitive direct marketing, Mah Jongg players are totally dependent on the League if they want to play the game.

Actually Nine or 10 bucks is cheap, cheep, cheap considering the many hours of pleasure and social interaction the game brings.

 

The Official 2021 Mah Jongg Card

 


The Arithmetic

The blue card pictured above contains the official 2021 hands and rules for American Mah Jongg players. The product is glossy paper card stock 5" x 18" folded into three 5" x 6" panels, printed front and back three colors over two.

 

Selling price: $10 for the large card and $9 for the small card. Let's say the average revenue per member is $9.50.

 

If 350,000 Mah Jongg players spend an average of $9.50 per year, that's a total revenue of a cool $3.325 million. Guaranteed every year. Yum, yum.

 

This blog post title calls the League "Fun, Funky and Fascinating," because I don't understand the arithmetic. Here's the lede of their Form 990 for the year ending Feb. 28, 2019. 

 

https://projects.propublica.org/nonprofits/display_990/133791092/10_2019_prefixes_13-16%2F133791092_201902_990PF_2019102416777254


 Yearly Revenue

Since the League is a private, non-profit 501(c)(3) foundation, the revenue is not from sales, but rather "contributions, gifts and grants." Two entries above are interesting.

• Look at the Last Line Above:

Contributions, gifts, grants, etc. received: $1,000,000

Golly gee, that's fascinating. First of all I have never seen an official tax form for an organization with many thousands of customers (donations) with exactly $1 million revenue! Always there are a few dollars and cents plus-or-minus. Whatever the actual amount, you can bet your sweet bippy it ain't no $1,000,000 even. Something is terribly odd.

 

Oops...

 I multiplied 350,000 members spending an average of $9.50 each and the calculator came up with $3.325 million. Yet the League claims an even-steven $1 million revenue. What happened to the other $2.325 million? Where'd it go???

 

The Rainy Day Fund

Now look at the boxes above:

Fair market value of all assets at end of year (from Part 11, col (c) line 16):

$10,476,384

In other words, in their 75+ years the League has amassed a tax free fun fund of $10.4 million walking-around money. Yum-yum.

 

"84 Years of Friendship & Charity"
Based on Creating Dependency!

The business model is truly unique. The League needs only to send out yearly reminders to players that they must purchase the coming year's card for the new rules and hands. Or else...

 

Or else they cannot play. Response has to be in the nabes of 80% - 95% (e.g., people die, move, get married/divorced and change names or they can't continue because of failing eyesight, go gaga, etc.).


However, if the League relied solely on these automatic renewals, it would be like the mythical oolum bird that flies in ever decreasing circles until if flies up its own cloaca and disappears.


The League Came Up with
An Ingenious Idea: M-G-M!

When I was running book clubs for Better Homes & Gardens, Macmillan and Grolier, we relied heavily on M-G-M—Member-Get-a-Member. A typical offer: "Introduce a new family to the Dr. Seuss books and the new member will receive two FREE Dr. Seuss books. PLUS AS A THANK-YOU GIFT, YOU WILL RECEIVE TWO FREE DR. SEUSS BOOKS FOR YOUR CHILD! 

     M-G-M was the second-most profitable marketing technique!


The National Mah Jongg League's
M-G-M Offer to Its Active Members

Sign up 35 or more new members and send us all their names at the same time and we will give your favorite charity a neat-o donation in your name. Your name and favorite charity will be listed in the League's bulletin. Here's how it looks and what is said:



 

 

 

 

 

 

             Newspapers and The Love of Fame
IMO the two greatest newspaper men in American history were: 

• William Randolph Hearst (1863-1951)
"You furnish the pictures. I'll furnish the war."

W.R. Hearst to artist Frederic Remington in Cuba, 1898

 

•  Warren G. Harding (1865-1923)*
*Yes, that Warren G. Harding who later became the 29th President of the United States and the second most corrupt occupant of the White House. (e.g. Teapot Dome Scandal.)


When he was in his 20s, Harding and a buddy bought the Marion (OH) Daily Star—a falling apart newspaper about to go out of business. The partners turned it into the largest, most profitable newspaper in the area (which it is today). Their simple publishing philosophy:

"Mention the Name of Every Person
In town at least twice a year." 

A huge majority of blokes—men, women,  LGBTs—from the bottom of rung of society to the highest reaches (e.g. Bezos, Gates, Musk, Oprah, the Kardashians et al.) adore personal publicity, their names in the papers, guest shots on The View, network and cable TV and social media.


• "Power is an aphrodisiac." —Henry Kissinger

• "Fame is an aphrodisiac." —Denny Hatch

 

Roger Craver Weighs in

 One of the savviest, smartest, funniest practitioners of Direct Marketing Sciences and Arts is America's premier Liberal fundraising impresario (Democratic candidates and groups, Habitat for Humanity et al.), co-editor of
The Agitator Blog and co-founder of  Donor Voice ("The Experience and Relationship Company.").

 

I sent Roger a work-in-progress of this post and asked him (1) if I were nuts and (2) was I liable to be sued by the National Mah Jongg League for questioning their Form 990-PF? Roger's reply (reprinted with permission):

 

Hi Denny,

As far as I can tell, these guys, while somewhat eccentric, are legit.

     I went back and looked at older tax returns (attached) and they comport, more or less with what you have. Some years they make more, some years less. My guess is that while they may claim certain number, any inaccuracies are probably not intentional

     Why do I say this? None of the officers are paid, there's no unusual expenses, and they do give away money. The IRS regulations require that a foundation give away 5% of its assets each year and the tax years I looked at show they're doing this. I did not look at the 2020 return in your draft. The charities they give to are legit.

     I've also attached a piece from the

Milwaukee Jewish News that gives a brief history of how this got started and also a copy of their current  Mah Jongg Blog. Fascinating. 

     In short, this looks to me like a legit, albeit somewhat bizarre charity. But then 'bizarre' is in the eyes of the beholder.

     Let me know if other questions.

Cheers,

Roger

 

Takeaways to Consider

• The National Mah Jongg M-G-M membership scheme is a helluva a lot cheaper that marketing with direct mail shots at say, $750/M. For starters, what lists could they rent. The League owns probably the only list of Mah Jongg players extant.

 

• The late, great direct marketing magazine circulation and merchandise consultant Dick Benson talked about the power of recruiting members v. sending out mailings.

 

• Benson's Rule: "If you can turn your subscription-based magazine into a membership organization, you raise response rates by 15%."

 

Can you Use the NMJL Business Model to Get Filthy Rich Tax-Free?

If the National Mah Jongg League can pull in an automatic $3.325 million a year from a membership of 350,000 game players, think of what you could do with 3 billion game players!!! Tax Free!!! 

 


 
Good hunting!
 
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Tuesday, March 23, 2021

#121 Blog Post ACLU Bomb

#121 Blog Post — DATE

 

http://dennyhatch.blogspot.com/2021/03/121-blo-post-aclu-bomb.html

 

Posted by Denny Hatch

 

THE ACLU’S BIG FAT BOMB 

 

Why was this gargantuan envelope mailing DOA and deader than Kelsey's nuts?


Let’s take it from the top.

 

This giant envelope showed up in our mailbox on March 20, 2021.

 

Note the message on 1) the green envelope and on 2) the personalized letter to Peggy:

 

Please Respond by:

January 30, 2021

 

No one in his or her right mind would send money nine weeks after the drop dead cut-off date.

 

What About Offers with Time Limits?

I went back into—Don Jackson’s and my 1998 rule book—2,239 Tested Secrets for Direct Marketing Success—­and here’s what came up:

 

46. Limited-time offers

Any limited-time offer tends to force a quick decision and avoid procrastination. It’s usually best to mention a specific date, such as “This special offer expires April 5th,” rather than “This offer expires in 10 days.”

 

47. Enrollment periods

Have been widely used by mail order insurance companies who include a specific cutoff date for the enrollment period. It implies that there are savings involved by processing an entire group of enrollments at one time.

 

48. Pre-publication offer

Long a favorite with publishers who offer a special discount or savings before the official publication date of a new book. The rationale is that it helps them plan their printing quantity more accurately.

 

49. Charter membership (or subscription) offer

Ideal for introducing new clubs, publications or other subscription services.  Usually includes a special price, gift or other incentive for charter members or subscribers.  And it appeals to those who like to be among the first to try new things.

 

50. Limited edition offer

A proven way to go for selling plates, coins, art prints or other collectible items.  The edition may be limited by date (e.g., a “firing period for plates”) or quantity.

 

Okay, admittedly this advice was published 22 years prior to Donald Trump and Postmaster General Louis DeJoy’s venal conspiracy to trash U.S.P.S. efficiency so Democrat (aka African American) mail-in ballots would arrive too late to be counted.

 

But… this was the ACLU’s big-time goof:

 

• It was (and is) common knowledge the U.S.P.S. delivery is in tatters. Clearly ACLU’s direct marketing team isn’t into following the news.

 

• No reason in hell existed to put a time limit on this survey mailing. There was no “Order by such-and-such a date and you save….” or any variations.

 

Other Broken Rules in

This Sad-Sack Effort

Here’s the lede of the main letter:

 

An Impersonal Lecture from “We” of the ACLU

Not one jot of warmth, charm or immediate benefits. You can just imagine some tight-lipped schoolmarm or master squinting nastily through rimless eyeglasses reading this crap in a pinched high little voice from a lectern.

 

Boring, scholarly prose calling up the horrors of the past four years instead of cashing in on Joe Biden and hope and promise for the future.

 

The salutation on this dreary impersonal thing—traditionally the a key element in any direct mail letter that makes the recipient believe it was especially "from CEO Anthony D. Romero" to "Peggy:

 

"Dear Friend,"

 

This is all the more strange when "Peggy" is personalized on three other panels—the giant outer envelope, survey letter and order form. 

 

Two Takeaways to Consider

• “The first 10 words are more important than the next ten thousand.”

     —Elmer "Sizzle" Wheeler

 

Harry Walsh on How to Write a Letter

The tone of a good direct mail letter is as direct and personal as the writer’s skill can make it. Even though it may go to millions of people, it never orates to a crowd, but rather murmurs into a single ear. It’s a mesmerizing message from one letter writer to one letter reader.

    

Tell a story if possible.

Everybody loves a good story, be it about Peter Rabbit or King Lear. And the direct mail letter, with its unique person-to-person format—is the perfect vehicle for a story.  And stories get read. The letter I wrote to launch the Cousteau Society twenty-some years ago has survived hundreds of tests against it. When I last heard, it was still being mailed in some form or other.  The original of this direct mail Methuselah started out with this lead: “A friend once told me a curious story I would like to share with you...” 

    —Harry Walsh, Freelancer

 

The Business of Survey Efforts Unmasked

Many years ago I called a contact at the NRCC (National Republican Congressional Campaign Committee) and asked him about one of his survey mailings.

 

“Why do people fill out surveys?” I asked.

 

“A politician asking for advice is flattering. People love talking about themselves. Once a voter answers the first question, he's hooked. With a survey he believes he can make a difference by going direct to the candidate. And he’ll send money hoping his survey goes direct to the candidate's ear.”

 

“Adding a survey in direct mail is expensive,” I countered.

 

“Surveys always lift response and always bring in more cash than non-survey mailings. Great PR. They make the guy feel worthwhile.”

 

“And how do you process the surveys?”

 

“We throw ‘em out. Nobody gives a damn what these people think. We just want their money.

 

Personal Sadness About this ACLU Fiasco

In March, 1977 my long-time client—the late Paul Goldberg—called to ask I would be interested in doing some work for the ACLU. I said yes, absolutely.

 

I took the train down to New York from Stamford, CT and we had a meeting with ACLU president Norman Dorsen and his team at their New York Headquarters. I laid a concept for a direct mail package on everybody and they liked it a lot. I left with everyone feeling upbeat about the project and I returned to Stamford and started work.

 

Three days later an egg hit the fan. Frank Collin and a troop of American Nazis had applied for a permit to hold a rally in the town park of Skokie, Illinois—a suburb of Chicago with and estimated 70,000 Jewish residents. Many of them were survivors of Nazi concentration camps. The Skokie city council promptly passed three town ordinances forbidding the Nazi rally and an Illinois judge upheld the decision.

 

This story made huge national news. The TV ratings were terrific and newspapers had a field day (or field month).

 

The ACLU agreed to defend the Nazis on the premise that not allowing the march was a violation of the Constitution’s guaranteed right to free speech. As CEO Norman Dorsen said to me, “We went into this holding our noses. But it was the right thing to do.”

 

Alas, the ACLU’s biggest bloc of donors—rich Jewish philanthropists—pulled the plug causing a financial catastrophe. Natch, our project was canceled unless I would agree to create the package pro bono. The ACLU was so cash strapped by the affair they couldn’t have afforded a test mailing at that point anyway.

 

I have always held the ACLU in the highest regard for doing what was right. Eventually they prevailed in the Skokie brouhaha, even though it damn near put them out of business. 

 

Takeaways to Consider

• Make sure decision-makers in your organization are on top of all the current news that might affect the profitability of your business.

 

• Direct mail is still a very viable advertising medium and is being judiciously and deliciously used in this epoch of a pandemic when we inmates are happy to have free diversions to read.

 

• Check out my prior two blog posts analyzing the giant Mayo Clinic direct mail masterpiece:

http://dennyhatch.blogspot.com/2021/02/119-power-of-fear.html 

 

http://dennyhatch.blogspot.com/2021/03/120-creating-believability.html

 

• However… given the crappy current record of U.S.P.S. delivery, if you do use mail, I urge you: Do not use a “limited time” or “cut-off date” offer.

 

• A cut-off date in mail offers has a new meaning: self-castration.

 

• With digital efforts, a limited time offer can certainly be tested. All promotions arrive in nanoseconds.

 

Another rule of limited-time mailings: 

Don’t use such a short window that if there’s a catastrophe (an attack on the Capitol or 8 feet of snow) the public's attention will be diverted for a couple of weeks. At the same time, don’t use a date so far in the future it loses all urgency.

 

• All information gleaned from studying past direct mail successes: offers, pricing, headlines, copy approaches, copy and design can be tested.

 

• “In direct marketing there are two rules and two rules only. Rule #1: Test everything. Rule #2: See Rule #1.”

    —Malcolm Decker

 

• “Don’t test whispers.” —Ed Mayer

 

• By “whispers,” Mayer means $49.95 v. $44.95. Blue vs. pink.

 

• Testing is expensive. Go for breakthroughs.


 

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