#109 The Weirdest Letter

 http://dennyhatch.blogspot.com/2020/09/109-weirdest-letter.html

 #109 Blog Post - Tuesday, September 22, 2020

Posted by Denny Hatch

 The Weirdest Letter Ever Received

Peggy handed me this thing the other day.

It was a notice that Henry—a dear friend of 25 years and one-time neighbor across the street—had failed to pay his $3294 long term care insurance premium.

The letter lede:

     The above mentioned individual has provided your name and address
     in order for this notice to be sent to you. The purpose is to inform or
     remind you that the policy is in danger of lapsing.

Hun?

I turned this bizzarro letter over to see what was on the back. 

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = 

PAYMENT EXPLANATION

 

FOR LONG TERM CARE INSURANCE POLICIES: 

 

PLEASE RETURN THE BOTTOM PORTION OF THIS BILL WITH YOUR CHECK MADE PAYABLE TO CONTINENTAL CASUALTY COMPANY IN THE RETURN ENVELOPE PROVIDED. 

 

THE PREMIUM DUE MUST BE PAID TO CONTINENTAL CASUALTY COMPANY OR TO THE AUTHORIZED COLLECTOR INDICATED ON THE ENCLOSED RETURN ENVELOPE. PAYMENTS MUST BE RECEIVED WITHIN THE GRACE PERIOD PROVIDED IN THE POLICY. 

 

IF WE DO NOT RECEIVE THE PREMIUM DUE, THE POLICY MAY LAPSE AND THE POLICY MAY BE FORFEITED AND VOID EXCEPT AS OTHERWISE PROVIDED IN THE POLICY. 

 

PAYMENT MAY BE MADE BY CHECK, BANK DRAFT, OR MONEY ORDER. 

 

YOUR AGENT DOES NOT HAVE THE AUTHORITY TO EXTEND THE TIME FOR PAYING ANY PREMIUM, TO WAIVE FORFEITURE, OR ALTER THE TERMS OR CONDITIONS OF ANY POLICY. 

 

THIRD PARTY NOTICE

IMPORTANT NOTICE TO OUR POLICY HOLDERS REGARDING THIRD PARTY NOTICE: 

 

IN ORDER TO HELP PROTECT YOUR VALUABLE LONG TERM CARE COVERAGE, WE OFFER YOU THE OPTION TO DESIGNATE A FAMILY MEMBER OR FRIEND TO BE A THIRD PARTY DESIGNEE. THIS THIRD PARTY DESIGNEE WOULD RECEIVE COPIES OF ANY LATE PAYMENT NOTICES. 

 

THE DESIGNATED PERSON WOULD BE ABLE TO HELP YOU TAKE STEPS TO PREVENT YOUR LONG TERM CARE POLICY FROM LAPSING DUE TO NON-PAYMENT OF PREMIUM. 

 

PLEASE FILL OUT THE FORM BELOW IF YOU DECIDE TO ADD, CHANGE, UPDATE OR REMOVE A THIRD PARTY DESIGNEE ON YOUR LTC POLICY. THE THIRD PARTY DESIGNEE MAY TERMINATE HIS OR HER RESPONSIBILITIES AT ANY TIME BY SUBMITTING A WRITTEN NOTICE TO YOU, THE POLICYHOLDER AND TO THE CONTINENTAL CASUALTY COMPANY. THE POLICY HOLDER MAY REMOVE, ADD, OR CHANGE THE THIRD PARTY DESIGNEE AT ANYTIME BY SENDING A WRITTEN REQUEST TO THE CONTINENTAL CASUALTY COMPANY, PO BOX 64912, ST. PAUL, MN 55164-0912. THE THIRD PARTY DESIGNEE IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR PREMIUM PAYMENT. 

 

□ Policyholder Address/Name Change □ Third Party to be removed □ I elect not to have a Third Party Designee □ I elect the following to be a Third Party Designee 

 

Name: ­­­______________________________________________

 

Address: _________City: ___________State.: ____Zip:.______

 

Policy Number _____Policyholder's Phone Number:. ________ 

 

Policyholder's Signature:. ______________________________ 

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

               I have seen a lot of insurance offers; never one like this.
Thirty-three years ago Peggy and I started WHO'S MAILING WHAT! — a newsletter and archive service about direct mail for direct marketers. We used to receive mail from correspondents around the country

     Average month's net (non-dupes): 1,800 mailings.

     Multiply that out over 30 years and it's 650,000 mailings.

     In all those years, the above is the weirdest, eeriest, strangest, most whacked-out letter I have ever seen.

             Why would an insurance company send Peggy such a letter?
     My initial opinion was the insurance industry is in crisis and desperate for loot.

     • Since the beginning of the year, there have been nearly 7,900 wildfires that have burned over 3.4 million acres in California alone. Since August 15, when California's fire activity elevated, there have been at least 25 fatalities and nearly 5,400 structures destroyed. Plus thousands more in Washington and Oregon.

     • As of September 19th, 6.7 million cases of Covid-19 with 384,687 hospitalizations and 191,303 deaths have been recorded.

     • Shaking our heads in wonderment, Peggy emailed Henry's wife and asked if we should pay the $3294.59 premium.

From Henry's wife to Peggy:
     Wow that is weird. Henry's CNA renewal was lost in the mail and
     they sent us a duplicate Which I paid this week. I will have Henry
     call CNA to fix this problem. Please ignore.

Still mystified, I emailed Henry's wife the text of the above CNA letter in red and black:

The above mentioned individual has provided your name and address in order for this notice to be sent to you. The purpose is to inform or remind you that their policy is in danger of lapsing. Please know that you are under no obligation to pay this amount, however this friend or family member requests that you contact them regarding the status of this overdue premium payment. In order to prevent this this policy from being lapsed, we must receive the premium no later than 30 calendar days from the date at the top of this notice. If you have questions, please call the toll free Policy Owner Services number listed above.

Quick question: The two lines in red: TRUE OR FALSE?

Her Response:
True. I'd forgotten that I gave them Peggy's name as backup in case I failed to pay my bill. Presumably when she got my late payment notice she would notify me to pay the bill. You notified me, and I paid, so it all works.

Okay. BUT NOBODY TOLD PEGGY!

                                    Takeaways to Consider
•Insurance is something you spend a ton of money on and hope you never collect.

• We have bought a lot of insurance over the years—automobile, health (including long term care), homeowner's, renter's, liability, travel, etc.—as well as studying hundreds of mail order insurance promotions. I have never seen anything like this.

• My opinion: the folks at CNA are chumps. Quite simply they dropped the ball by not thinking through the offer and confusing the hell out of—and sending shock waves through—two of Henry's best friends. (Were they okay? Have they gone broke and are cutting back by cancelling their health policy?

• In short, you have to think through every possible contingency when you make an offer. In this case, either CNA or Henry should have mentioned to Peggy that she was involved in this transaction.

• Here's a true story about a marketing screw-up by the chumps in one of the major airlines—I don't remember which one.
     Prior to the era of frequent-flyer miles, the airline's agency came up with the idea to take advantage of the revolutionary new techniques of (then) leading-edge computer razzle-dazzle—the ability to create personalized and signed letters—Trompe l'oeil. They looked like the real deal. These could not only include the person's name, address and personalized salutation ("Dear Mr. & Mrs. Sample"), but also adding individual information about that person in the body of the letter to show how much the airline cared.
     Why not write a letter to all recent passengers thanking them for flying with the airline and include a temporary membership card for admission to the airline club lounge at the local airport? the agency reasoned. This might generate some club memberships and some travel business. The airline marketing VP loved the idea and gave the green light. The personalized letter went something like this.

     Dear Mr. & Mrs. Sample,
     We were delighted that you chose (name of airline) for your
     recent trip to Las Vegas...

     One not-so-small problem surfaced.

     This warm, fuzzy letter arrived in homes across the country and a lot of Mrs. Samples opened it. (It was addressed to Mr. & Mrs. Sample.)

     In a number of instances, the "Mrs. Sample" who flew to Vegas with Mr. Sample was NOT the real Mrs. Sample, but rather another lady. 

     Oops.

     Instead of database wizardry, a marketing catastrophe ensued. Divorces. Lawsuits. Ugly. Ugly.

      So, yes, you own your customers. But you have to be damn careful what you say to them!

 

                     😁  (PERSONAL CONFESSION) 😁
      Any Time I hear the word “insurance” I think
        of Woody Allen in Take the Money and Run
Allen was on a chain gang with a bunch of other prisoners and incurred the wrath of the boss. As special punishment he was consigned to three days in a black hole with an insurance salesman. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QfUQzppLyDM

      

 

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#108 Selling Air Travel amid Covid-19

 http://dennyhatch.blogspot.com/2020/09/108-selling-air-travel-amid-covid-19.html

#108 Blog Post – Tuesday, September 8, 2020

Posted by Denny Hatch

The Ultimate Marketing Challenge:
Selling Air Travel Amid Covid-19

After 6 months of self-inflicted Covid-19 isolation, Peggy and I would love to jump on a jet and fly off to one of the two trips we canceled last February. Looking at the current pandemic data worldwide, the answer is NFW.

                                              However...
What if a family emergency on the West Coast or across the globe suddenly required our presence?  

     How could the airlines make me feel safe and emotionally comfortable amidst the crush of humanity in the airport and later inside an Airbus A-321 hurtling at 520 MPH at 35,000 feet altitude—squeezed into an 11'-6"-wide tube sitting immobile 3-aisle-3 across—for six-to-ten hours amidst 186 other passengers any one of whom could be a highly contagious spreader of the killer Covid-19?

     What triggered this post was the P.R. pitch from a flak at The Aviation Agency dot com, where business is probably very slow. From her email:

 

Imagine in the future you want to fly to Florida. One airline is $350, another $450. But the more expensive one has spent the last 18 months convincing you that their Coronavirus protocols are the best in the industry. They retrained their staff, replaced all the seats with antimicrobial fabric, they doubled the air filtration system, etc. Wouldn’t you pay the extra $100 if it made you feel safer? 

 

Troy Hayes, Creative Director of The Aviation Agency, thinks you would. And so would he. Please reach out if you would like to speak with Troy about his insights on why now is the time for airlines to save their brand. Not make quarterly numbers. Thanks! —Lauren Smith September 1, 2020

 

Lauren’s Fascinating Marketing Challenge Got My Juices Flowing!

When Covid-19 eventually disappears—or a vaccine is widely distributed and proven effective—another pandemic will probably show up. Call it eBozo, London Fluzie or MOO-GOO-GAI-PANdemic.

 

For Covid-19, the airlines have mothballed their fleets and are riding out catastrophic financial losses. As Lauren Smith and Troy Hayes above suggest, maybe now is the time to invest in saving their brands.

 

Quite simply, saving a brand means upgrading aircraft, dramatically improving travel protocols and selling the scheme to the public.

 

The airlines carried 924.4 million passengers in 2019, so the potential market is huge and eminently reachable. Will they bite?

 

Needed for Passenger Safety and Emotional Comfort:

    1. Separation (either 6' distance or Plexiglass panels)

    2. Face shields and masks.

    3. Seat upholstery and carpet disinfectants.

    4. Frequently sanitized loos.

    5. Double/triple air filtration.

    6. A Swag Bag of PPE and protective goodies.

 

Prowling the Internet for Current Thinking (OUCH!)

 

I stumbled across the above rendering on Google.

 

This is separation at its most austere—a 21^st century version of a Bauhaus interior. Sterile, cold, harsh and impersonal.

 

• What a gawdawful environment! Imagine these surroundings for 6 hours flying across country or 23 hours straight from Chicago to Singapore!  

  

• Further, it puts airline profitability in extremis—way too much separation for far too few passengers. 

 

Three Possible Safe-seating Configurations

1.   High Plexiglass back-screens to separate rows and ward off sneezes, hawked lungers and baby brats hanging off the seat tops. Here three people would be scrunched cheek-by-jowl with no separation devices. The refit would cost the airline killer amounts of money per plane while individual passengers are still endangered.

 

2.   No pricey cabin redesign. Seats sprayed prior to take-off. Plexiglass back screens installed atop existing standard three-across seats will diminish the danger of sneezes, the hawking of lungers and oh-so-cute babies. However, the middle seat is eliminated with a Plexiglass separation panel, seriously reducing passenger count and profitability.

 

3.   Existing seats (à la version 2) with two Plexiglass panels efficiently separating three passengers. If two people are traveling together, the panel between could be removed.

Let’s say the airlines' sphincter-tight bean-counters agree to invest in the low-cost merger of illustrations #2 & #3 above.
Their mantra would be that of Kevin Costner: “Build it and they will come.”

 

“Build it and they will come is bullshit,” said Willard Rouse, developer of Boston’s Faneuil Hall Market restoration and Baltimore’s Inner Harbor. “Build it, sell the hell out of it and they will come!”

 

                        The Challenge of Selling the Public
As a marketeer, I always try to put myself inside the heads of my prospects—think how they think, feel what they feel. Actually I BECOME my prospect. What would I say to me? What would sell me—on travel in a commercial jet?

 

     Here are the protocols I think I could live with (and hopefully not die from):

Face Shield, Mask and Swag Bag

(NOTE: With face shield, it's possible to push mask below chin for intake of food and drink. Not exactly gracious dining, but life sustaining.)

• Remember, I am paying the airline a $100 Pandemic Supplement on top of my airfare, so I should expect a bunch of goodies. 

• Okay, here's the drill: I arrive at PHL via limo, Uber, taxi, family car or bus. I am stopped and required to show boarding passes. Guard puts a check mark on the paperwork and returns it to me along with face shield and mask. These must be donned prior to entering the airport interior.

 

• At some point during check-in we are each handed a travel kit:

If airline bean counters nix Denny's low-cost seating modifications...
Plan B: Hand out all of the above plus a sturdy, lightweight PPE isolation gown.

                                Takeaways to Consider
• The above may represent the future of air travel. Yuck.

 

• BTW, also the future of train and bus travel.

 

• If I walked into a crowded airport where everyone was wearing a face shield and mask, I do believe I would indeed feel a helluva lot safer flying out to a family emergency.

• Is the above sufficient to persuade Peggy and me to take a pleasure trip? NFW. 

 

• I would like to postpone an eternity without vodka for as long as possible.

          Dear Readers... Your Input and Ideas Are Wanted!
• What ideas can you add?

• What have I missed or got wrong?

• Your critique of this post—pro or anti?

Thank you.

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#107 Flattery!

http://dennyhatch.blogspot.com/2020/09/107-flattery.html

 #107 Blog Post – Tuesday, September 1, 2020

Posted by Denny Hatch

 

How Flattery Can Dramatically Increase Your
Response in Email, Direct Mail and Print Ads

 

Once upon a time BTI (Before-the-Internet) if a marketer wanted to make an offer, the mailing was created and lists of logical prospects were rented.

In the 1960s, legendary freelance copywriter Ed McLean was hired to write a direct mail subscription letter for Newsweek. At the time he wrote it, McLean was new to the business. He became fascinated with the whole concept of list selection while sitting in on meetings with Pat Gardner (later circulation director of Family Media) and the late Red Dembner, then Newsweek's circulation director.

Above is the Ed McLean’s brilliant lede for Newsweek.

It was an off-beat approach—one that both flattered the reader and, at the same time, let prospects in on how they came to receive the solicitation. Many people wrote in to ask what list they were on. A few complained. Many more responded by subscribing to the magazine.

It was control for many years and was mailed in the tens of millions.

This Post Is About How to Write Copy—
Not Just Any Copy—But Great Copy!

I’m talking about copy that persuades people to change their behavior:

         • 0rder a product or service.
         • Donate money to a cause.
         • Send for more information.

In order to change behavior, it is imperative to use one (or more) of the Seven Key Copy Drivers — the hot-button emotional cattle prods that make people act.

It was Seattle direct marketing guru Bob Hacker and Swedish entrepreneur Axel Andersson who came up with the 7 Key Copy Drivers:

Fear – Greed – Guilt – Anger
Exclusivity – Salvation - Flattery

These are the basic seven. The only seven.

“If your copy isn't dripping with one or more of these, tear it up and start over.”
—Bob Hacker

The greatest historical collection of direct mail samples was Peggy’s and my WHO’S MAILING WHAT! Archive, with detailed results information on more than 425,000 mailings in nearly 200 categories going back 35 years.

The second greatest archive was amassed by the retired Swedish direct marketing mogul and guru Axel Andersson—the world’s premier student of the direct marketing letter. Twice a year he would fly north to visit our archive. He spent his days prowling through our mailings at our offices making sheaves of notes. Meanwhile, we in turn, would send him weekly boxes of duplicate mailings down to Palm Coast, Florida where he bought the house next door to store his massive collection.

One year he analyzed 1,127 direct mail letters (consumer, b2b, fund raising and other nonprofits (e.g., association memberships, Who’s Who directories, etc.).

Axel’s astonishing discovery: 42% of all these letters in dozens of different industries were pinned to flattery.

The takeaway: If you can make your prospects feel real good about themselves—proud their accomplishments, positions and sense of self-worth—you will capture their attention and they will more likely respond.

This is not about direct mail marketing vs. digital marketing.
It’s about messaging—how to make it work in every medium.

(Incidentally, all letters shown in this post are Grand Controls. They were mailed over 3 consecutive years or more—sometimes a lot more—which means they generated millions of dollars in revenue!)

 

                                          Takeaways to Consider
• The Seven Key Copy Drivers—the emotional hot buttons that get people to act:
              Fear - Greed - Guilt - Anger - Exclusivity - Salvation - Flattery

• “If your copy isn’t dripping with one or more of these, tear it up and start over.
— Robert Hacker

• These 7 copy drivers have shown to increase response in every medium— digital/Internet, direct mail, space advertising, telemarketing.

• There was a period when Ed McLean's mailing would never fly. Consumers got squeamish about direct marketers knowing so much about them—the magazines they read, book club membership, purchases for the house, etc.

• Ed McLean and I had a long conversation about this and he agreed that his lede woud be a tough sell.

• Ed came up with this marketing rule: “You must dumb down what you know.”

• In other words, you may know a lot about the person you are writing to, but you cannot reel off information about a person that you got from someplace else. It is eerie. It is creepy. It is disrespectful.

• Of course today our private lives are known to the world.

• In an early blog I caught a guy red-handed stealing a private message from my Yahoo email exchange with a subscriber. It pissed me off. But then I said screw it; this is how things are now.

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